Former Legal Assistant 20+ Years of Experience In all these years working with people going through divorces I have noticed certain similarities, most believe that a divorce has to be a pitched battle. It's not like that. Sometimes we want to hide our suffering by acting angry and showing a personality that is not ours so as not to see ourselves "defeated". It is worth mentioning that a divorce is often compared to the death of a loved one, since it is the closing of a cycle in your life, and as such we experience all the stages of a mourning. As human beings we find it difficult to change our life patterns, especially if they are uncomfortable, unexpected and painful. As a divorce coach, my goal is to help my clients make that transition less intense and painful by showing them that there is a way to end a relationship without destroying it. For those with children, contact with the ex-partner is inevitable since shared parenting is a fact after a divorce and according to the seeds we sow in this process, they will be the fruits we will harvest for the future. Consider the Following Steps Before Filing a Divorce Claim. Make sure your marriage is over before beginning the process. Today couples are spending more time together on the order to stay home due to the current pandemic. Apart from the fear of illness, we deal with more people at home, our lifestyle has changed and it is normal for emotions to fly everywhere and in the process we confuse them. Determine if you really want a separation and that you are not acting under an emotion caused by anxiety, anger, stress, sadness, etc. Educate Yourself on the Subject Educate yourself on the types of divorces and options. A friendly divorce will save you a lot of money and headaches. Consult with at least 2 attorneys specialized in family law. Also to a financial advisor since the economy in your home will surely see changes. Get copies of all your financial documents as soon as possible. If your divorce is amicable, you can obtain documents at any time. But, when a divorce gets ugly, financial documents tend to "disappear." Get your credit report to avoid surprises along the way. Emotional Support Choose a divorce coach or therapist to help you cope with the emotional side if things get tough. Many people spend a lot of money on legal fees for not preparing their questions and inadvertently use their lawyer as a "therapist" using the legal preparation time to "blow off steam." Don't Talk Bad About Your Spouse with Children Your children love your spouse, don't tell them about the unethical or unethical things that they did during the marriage. They already have enough with the fact that they know that mom and dad are going to separate. Don't add to their pain.